What kind of flower are you?

 During my last trip to San Francisco, I was fortunate enough to be able to attend a meditation session and dharma talk at the Zen Center. What a gift to be able to meditate in a space so rooted in the ancestry of Western Buddhism. After the meditation, there was a dharma talk in a room full of   seasoned monks and nuns, eager students and visitors.

 

A roshi in her late 60's came into the room, sat and began to speak.

 She began by saying that she was about to resign her position as the head roshi of the zen center, and that the decision to step down had been challenging for her. The thread of her dharma talk focused on her journey to the middle way of this decision......the choice that would cause the lest harm and be the kindest for everyone.

She told us her story.

The previous year, she had been walking on a busy San Francisco street when she noticed the bus that she needed to catch on the other side of the street. When she saw the bus, she was filled with a sense of childlike joyfulness and inhibition. Filled with the energy of this enthusiasm, she impulsively  made a dash across the street to the bus. The next thing she remembered was being taken to the hospital by ambulance.

She giggled as she told the story ...amused at her own heedless behavior.

She had fallen and incurred a head injury. After the incident, she began to have headaches and other symptoms that were interfering with the performance of her job as the roshi of the center.  She had tried to carry on her duties for a year before she realized that, since the accident, she was "a different kind of a flower". She would have to find the right conditions for "this kind of flower".

And this beautiful thought was a great insight to me.....a metaphor that could point the way to the middle of the river.

She explained that for a fern to live fully and completely living out its fern-ness; it would require the conditions of a rain forest.....lots of water and intermittent light.  A fern's roots are shallow and they need water that lies on the surface of the earth. It enjoys small droplet of water on it's skin and just enough sun to call out its fronds gently to the light.

Now if the kind of flower that you are is a cactus ..... you would not thrive in the rain forest........this rain forest does not have the conditions that a cactus needs. A cactus needs the long days of hot sun and intense light, the infrequent water, the cold nights........a fern would do really poorly given these conditions. It would be such a struggle for the fern to be a fern, in the conditions that created the most splendid cactus.

Now the fern is perfectly a fern. When a fern has the conditions that meet it's needs, it is always whole, beautiful and a pleasure to behold....have you ever seen a fern, being anything other than a fern  that was not stunning. No extra effort to be a fern.....just the right conditions.

And the cactus is perfectly a cactus. No extra effort to be a cactus if the conditions are right. When the conditions are scrupulously met......the cactus becomes fully cactus-ness. It takes no extra effort to manifest a flower so brilliant to the cold black starry night and so magnificently scented that every grain of sand in the desert breathes in deeply, grateful for the moment.


Norma